On Trauma and Healing

You know what they say about healing. 
You gotta dig deep, pull out the mush, lay it bare and let it hit you
You pause, cry it out and stand back up
It's only then that the battle can begin.

But what if you don’t get up
What if the baggage is so heavy,
it crushes you
Leaving you incapable of recovering
All those memories that you fought so hard to forget all up in your face.
And you’re too weak to fight them.

The heartbreaks from your parents failed attempt at raising you
The death of your grandpa when you were 13. When you walked in and saw his lifeless body with the cutting wool stuffed in his ears and nose.
Your warped first introduction to sex
The betrayals in friendships that happened time after time
The times you were silenced and had no voice to speak
The time that silence made you lose the most important part of you.

What if you’re strong enough?
What if you come out of this battle with the head of your attacker swinging from your fingers.

What if you learn to love again
And you learn to trust again
What if the right people come to you
And you bare your souls to each other
What if you find that safe haven you’ve always wanted.
And you speak with confidence.

What if you can conquer the world
But all you need is that first shelter of faith

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